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You Thought Normal Bugs Were Icky? Wait Til You See What They Used To Look Like.

We probably can all agree that bugs and snakes are the worst. Creepy-crawlies, in general, can stay in their dark hiding places. I”m sure we”ll all be glad to be rid of them this winter. Normal bugs are gross, sure. But they”re an extremely manageable size compared to their prehistoric grandparents.

Good luck trying to squash them with a rolled-up newspaper.

1. Anomalocaris (a weird shrimp-squid)

Anomalocaris (a weird shrimp-squid)

Anomalocaris”s name literally means “abnormal shrimp,” which is a pretty accurate statement. This underwater nightmare was 3 feet long and had a mouth filled with thorny fangs. It lived almost 500 million years ago.

2. I. Rex (the giant horseshoe crab)

I. Rex (the giant horseshoe crab)

At about two feet long, this ancient crab is the largest species of trilobite that ever lived.

3. Titanoboa (the giant snake)

Titanoboa (the giant snake)

The Titanoboa was 40-50 feet long and weighed 2 and a half thousand pounds. It could probably kill ALL of the things.

4. Campanile Giganteum (a big ole snail)

Campanile Giganteum (a big ole snail)

The largest snail ever to live was the underwater campanile giganteum. It was 2 ft long and had a shell that was distinctive from the one of snails today.

5. Cameroceras (a giant, nightmarish cephalopod)

Cameroceras (a giant, nightmarish cephalopod)

This giant shelled predator is estimated to have been over 30 feet long and was the largest sea predator during the Paleozoic era. If you look at its picture for too long, you”ll surely have nightmares about it tonight.

6. Jaekelopterus (the giant sea scorpion)

Jaekelopterus (the giant sea scorpion)

It was a scorpion. It was giant. It was underwater. These monstrous sea scorpions were 8 feet long and had pincers that were 18 inches long.

7. Pulmonoscorpius (the giant NORMAL scorpion)

Pulmonoscorpius (the giant NORMAL scorpion)

The sea didn”t have all of the giant scorpions, oh no! This land scorpion was about two feet long and had enough venom to kill most larger animals.

8. Arthropleura (a centipede that was just much too large)

Arthropleura (a centipede that was just much too large)

This bug was a whopping 8ft long and several feet wide. It could be ridden by a horse (probably). It was one of the biggest invertebrate species that ever lived. It was basically the real version of the centipedes found in Peter Jackson”s version of King Kong.

9. Meganeura (an enormous, probably evil, dragonfly)

Meganeura (an enormous, probably evil, dragonfly)

This flying fright had a wingspan of two feet and its body grew to be about 17 inches. Children and adults alike would run in terror from this guy.

10. Platyceramu (an uber-giant clam)

Platyceramu (an uber-giant clam)

Reaching over three feet long, this was the largest bivalve that ever lived. Think how big the pearl would be! (Now, you will forever be disappointed at Red Lobster when you order the fried clams…)

Can you imagine what it would be like if these creatures were around? That dragonfly could carry off even the most heavyset of our children. You”d have to go outside with a steel shovel every day just to make it to work without having to slay a giant snake-beast with it.