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Things Were So Bad In The USSR, They Made Toys Out Of Potatoes

The Soviet Union was dissolved in 1991 when I was about a year old. I have no memory of what it was like for our country to be staring down the contentiousness of the Cold War, nor do I have any idea what it was like to live under Soviet rule.

But based on these pictures of what appear to be homemade toys, I can imagine that things weren’t exactly splendid. If you need further evidence, check out these super-depressing Russian toys made out of potatoes!

Potato car sold separately.

Potato car sold separately.

Walking the potato dog, while reading about the laziness of American workers in the Potato Press.

Walking the potato dog, while reading about the laziness of American workers in the Potato Press.

Potato dog’s owner was used to make a tasteless stew.

Potato dog's owner was used to make a tasteless stew.

This potato horse was made by candlelight. The candle was…also a potato.

This potato horse was made by candlelight. The candle was...also a potato.

Soviet children would have their potato men engage in fantastical adventures, like playing on a see-saw…or playing with anything that wasn’t a potato, really.

Soviet children would have their potato men engage in fantastical adventures, like playing on a see-saw...or playing with anything that wasn't a potato, really.

This potato strongman will have no problem defeating the lazy, fat Americans in hand-to-hand combat.

This potato strongman will have no problem defeating the lazy, fat Americans in hand-to-hand combat.

Because it has so many hands.

Any potato fish this potato man catches will be shared with the potato community.

Any potato fish this potato man catches will be shared with the potato community.

This potato man has found a mushroom in the meadow where he buried his starving family.

This potato man has found a mushroom in the meadow where he buried his starving family.

Again, I have absolutely know idea why these sad toys were produced, but let’s all be thankful that we at least had Hot Wheels and Legos.